LGBTQ-friendly psychotherapeutic treatment

Why exactly should psychotherapy be LGBTQ-friendly?

Part of this stems from psychology's dark past, in which it defined deviation from heteronormativity as a deviation that required treatment. Even today, when conversion therapy is a violation of the code of ethics, you can still find psychotherapists who don't understand enough about LGBTQ patients, who talk about M2F trans in the male gender, who have difficulty accepting sexual practices in the community, or who don't understand the difference between biological sex and gender.

There are subjects that are unique to patients from the LGBTQ community: the period before coming out, in which a person is required to choose between being true to themselves and their beliefs, or lying to themselves and adapting to society's expectations. The period after coming out, in which a person may encounter hatred and rejection from society and family, for being who they are. And in fact, coming out never ends, there will always be more people in front of whom you have not come out.

The issue of body acceptance and self-acceptance are matters that are front for any trans person.

There is also content related to finding a partner, starting a family, and accepting our sexual orientation and gender, which are unique to the LGBTQ community.

And there are also "normal" topics of psychotherapy, such as anxiety or depression or life crises, which are seemingly exactly the same for the community sufferer as for the heteronormative, and yet, it is more comfortable to open up to a therapist who knows who you are and what your tendencies are, and accepts you exactly as you are.

Psychotherapy should be inclusive, accepting, and enabling for every patient who comes for psychotherapy.

Lesbians, gays, trans, bisexuals, and queers who come for psychotherapy should have the opportunity to think and say whatever comes to their mind during such therapy, without having to consider a hundred times whether the therapist in front of them is able to hear it, can accommodate it, or will judge them for it.

It should be possible to say things that are true for the present moment, and not set in stone forever, and for the therapist in front of you to be flexible enough to accept the ambiguity, fluidity, and changes that occur in you between sessions, and from moment to moment.

There needs to be an understanding that trans, lesbian, gay, bisexual, and queer people grew up in a community and society that only partially accepts them, and therefore each and every one of the community also has an introverted part in them that has difficulty accepting the queer part of them, hates it, and would be happy to see it fade away. Self-hatred is almost always ingrained.

I can guarantee:

That I know and respect and have friends from all the rainbow of LGBTQ varieties, and am always happy to meet and get to know new people in depth.

That I will always ask what the correct pronoun to use.

That I won't turn up my nose at any sexual practices. I've heard almost everything.

That I know how to contain the contradictions that exist within a person's soul. That a person can be one on Sunday, two on Monday, and eighteen on Tuesday.

I will not try to change, fix, or straighten you out.

That I will accept you, for all your parts.

Photo credit: Dany Sternfeld